Safety First: The secret to processing narcissistic abuse trauma

I think there’s an idea in the world of recovery from any sort of trauma – narcissistic abuse included – that it requires revisiting the feelings that were felt during the abuse and that if those feelings are felt and those experiences re-examined properly then the survivor will be released from it all.  Although that may work in some cases, …

The importance of getting away from a narcissistic abuser

One of the most challenging aspects in recovering from narcissistic abuse is the task of putting psychological, emotional, and sometimes physical distance between yourself and your narcissistic abuser.  I’ve talked about the guilt and ambivalence that can sometimes emerge when beginning to separate from a narcissistic family or partner.  Questions can arise like: “Am I making all this up?”, “Am …

You feel so bad because the narcissist has to feel so good

Cinderella might be thought of as the story of how a woman survived and recovered from narcissistic abuse.  Here you have a very kind and beautiful woman who’s scapegoated and treated like the scourge of the earth by her narcissistic stepmother and stepsisters…forced to clean up after them all and deserving of nothing good in return.  It’s clear in the …